What Is Eroticism?

Photo by Kristal Passy

After years of exploring, experimenting and engaging with life as a sensual student of pleasure, an incredibly concise definition of the erotic has emerged:

to move while feeling

to move while feeling from the inside

to move with curiosity while feeling from the inside

Do you see what I’m doing here? Some amount of interoception (sensing our internal state) with active receptivity offers us a doorway into eroticism. The key is to remember to feel ourselves. Turn up the volume of our interoception, and move towards our body’s curiosity.

And good news: simplifying our definition of the erotic provides more access points to experiencing it. Next time you take a shower and wash your body, test out this definition: "to move while feeling". Does moving soap along your arms, while feeling from the inside, offer you a doorway into eroticism? After one sensation, do you feel drawn to another sensation? Another body part or type of touch? See how far from standard notions of the erotic you can get... mowing the lawn... tying your shoes... making a frittata. What's possible when you realize you have a body, and you can move towards curiosity?

Every act can be erotic, and no one but you can name it.